Hilarious Letter to the Editor

This letter to the editor is telling. More telling is the fact that my college paper actually published it:

Catch your attention

From my understanding, the purpose of the front page of a newspaper is to catch the attention of the potential reader. Without this initial interest, very few people would take the time to actually open the newspaper and read the articles. A fast-paced picture of a basketball player dunking the ball or a shot of a huge block in a volleyball game definitely grabs your attention.

On the other hand, a large picture of Sen. Hillary Clinton speaking at a podium just doesn't have the same effect. I am not saying there shouldn't be a picture of Clinton or an article about the primaries, because I love to read about what is going on in the nation and the world; it just shouldn't be the focus of the front page.

As a student at BYU, I happen to enjoy hearing news about my school and what's going on around campus. If you want to read a newspaper that doesn't have articles about school activities, then I suggest you spend 75 cents and purchase a different newspaper. According to The Daily Universe editor, "The sports desk is given one front page package a week. Sports may be given an extra page under special circumstances such as the conference tournament." I think The Daily Universe does a great job catching the reader's interest and is fair in its use of the front page. If BYU is participating in a big tournament - as a student and a fan - I want to know about it, and I commend the paper for presenting that information in a way that catches my attention. Thank you.

JEFF ROBERTS

Provo

The first two paragraphs are the best. I could comment on the misplaced priorities of our nation, but I'd rather make fun of the letter. Read the following in a high-pitched, squeaky voice:

"I like it when I see people jumping on big squares with words. This song has nice bass. I eat Pop-Tarts for every meal."

Jeff, the next time the newspaper tries to distract you with piddling irrelevant stories about the election of the leader of the free world or massive genocide, a look at this image ought to tide you over until the next orange or white object flying through the air catches your eye:


There. Got your attention, didn't it?